Obama Gaming The Gulf

The Dredge Report: President Obama visits Louisiana, picks up tar balls on the beaches for a photo op, then jets to San Fransciso to describe the scene while Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal still lacks federal approval for dredging to create barrier islands. Various Secretaries visit, their visits are announced proudly by the Great and Wonderful Oz in his various utterances. Still no go-ahead to dredge.

Why. The. Hell. Not?

[Insert: The previous sentence has been patterned after the Great Hypnotist's style of speech. Have you noticed how he habitually breaks up a single sentence into multiple parts, each with its own period? The following example comes from a sound bite overheard on the radio just tonight.]

Obama, saying the Louisiana situation is "heartbreaking" but certainly not sounding like he meant it, then following up with a pitch to avoid drilling altogether in favor of "clean" (green) energy: "...and the economy. That leads. The clean energy. Economy. Will lead. The global. Economy."

Perhaps the OzBaminator simply believes his audience incapable of absorbing more than three words at a time. Who knows? For his core political base, he might even have that right. Never mind that his entire premise is questionable; groupies don't question.

However, to get back to the topic of the day: Despte the fact that a few bloggers have tagged Governor Jindal's idea of building barrier islands a "looney tunes" concept, that doesn't mean it's not viable. So far, at least, not one credible authority (such as, for example, the head of the Army Corps of Engineers) has gone on record to say such a plan wouldn't work. If there's even a chance of it working, wouldn't it be worth a shot without these endless licensing delays ?

Sure it would. Unless. That "unless" has been bugging me for two solid days and nights. During that time, a few reasons for denying Louisiana the weapons to simply survive have come to mind. They're horrible, and they presuppose the sitting President of the United States to be such a total politcal creature that he could turn his back on countless citizens and untold amounts of wildlife, leaving them to suffer in many cases to the point of--literally--death.

In a sense, genocide.

Talk about playing your race card. He'd have to be willing to write off big chunks of the human race, not to mention birds, fish, shrimp, and even oily alligators. But I can't come up with any other excuse for what he's not doing (any more than I can come up with any more excuses to postpone stuccoing the house).

The most likely motivators for the Do-Nothing Dude as he attempts to Game The Gulf:

1. The longer the oil spill runs rampant, the more mileage he can get out of it as a reason to promote his OGA (Overly Green Agenda) at the expense of all other (fossil fuel) energy sources. And he did just that in his San Franciso speech, no doubt endearing himself to every out-of-work shrimper sitting idle in the Gulf. .

2. The barrier islands might actually do some good, and that would make a Republican already mentioned as Presidential material look really good, i.e. Piyush "Bobby" Jindal. Obama would rather wrestle Freddy Krueger than give Jindal credit for a solid idea.

3. Working with Sarah Palin would give her instant credibility he can't afford; better half the country chokes on floating crude oil than that. Never mind that she knows the drill and knows the right people to consult; she's a Republican, for Alinsky's sake! Scary, too!

In the sky--it's a bird! It's a plane! Yes, it is a plane! It's...VACATION MAN!!!! Am I the only one who finds OzBama's tendency to take vacations bizzare to say the least? And his overbearing indifference toward the entire United States of America? True, I was a rancher's son, and ranchers don't get vacations, so maybe I'm biased, but.... Let's start with his bragging about hanging around last December to extort Health Care Deformed into law. Then when he does go on vacation amid much hoopla, Major Hasan carries out a terrorist attack on Fort Hood (where a nephew of mine happens to be stationed, by the way). For that, the OzBaminator doesn't even break off his Hawaiian Holiday (or for that matter even admit that terrorism was involved).

Most impressive for the man with Vacation Superpower! (Never mind that Sarah Palin is his kryptonite....)

The Gulf, though? Not even the Master of Indifference can safely ignore the Gulf when the oil spill calls. No, he becomes "enraged" when BP's effort to top-kill the spill doesn't work. Why enraged? After all, it was the federal government that made BP stop the top kill effort in mid-kill. The Louisianan staring disconsolately at a Shrimp Moon he cannot exploit--he should be (and probably is) enraged. But the OOO?! (That would be "Oval Office Occupant".)

Oh. I get it. He's enraged because he opened his big mouth when he thought it was going to work. Now it's making him look bad. Poor fellow. He doesn't realize the oil spill is no longer "his Katrina" but has been upgraded to "his Iran hostage crisis"...by no less than a Democratic political strategist!

Even more important to someone as self-absorbed as The Man Without A Clue, the Gulf spill has shortened his latest vacation by making landfall in Louisiana (according to the latest Internet newsbits).

Gulf: Approximately....763.

Obama: Exactly....0.

Source for statistics: The citizens of Louisiana. They are keeping score, you know.