Al Gore, Global Warming, And More : Secret Rap Uncovered

Not to waste another day writing about methane breather Al Gore, Godfather of Manmade Global Warming, but WHAT IF Mr. Gore really HAD tried to come up with a "cool rap" about the time he was running for President? Hey, some brain dead campaign advisor might really have advised him to do so in order to overcome his less than lively public image! You never know!

Well then. We think the rap might have sounded something like this:

My name is Al Gore; I'm a real cool cat

Y'all know I invented the Inter-nat

Blame it on Bush; I invented that too

I invented Tipper; I invented you!

I can see the future from my ivory tower

I can tell ya what's comin' 'cause I got that power

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I'm gonna get the shaft from a hanging chad

The best stroke of luck that I ever had

'Cause that'll set me free to run all about

Caper like a goat, just beller and shout

I got this idea kind of clearly forming

Gonna sell y'all on manmade global warming!

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I'll make a billion bucks on clean energy

While blowing out gas like it all was free

I may end up looking like I need a nap

Who cares? I'll be rich! That's my Al Gore rap

They'll give me a prize called the great Nobel

Which they only ever give to a libber-el

Anything the Right says is a bunch o' crap

Hear me tell you how it is; it's my Al Gore rap

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I'll make so much money that I'll give rebates

To old George Soros and that dork Bill Gates

Global warming done caused the nationwide cold snap

I the Godfather have spoken; it's the Al Gore rap

Ride a bicycle while I live in my castle

Don't you dare give me guff; I don't need the hassle

The big blizzard out there came from global warming

I know it; I'm a genius, got an idea forming

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Never mind the frozen homeless; gonna take a nap

Global warming froze your tootsies; it's the Al Gore rap

As I sat down to write this hub around 6:00 a.m. in our home near the Mexican border in southern Cochise County, Arizona, the outside thermometer showed 7 degrees above zero, Fahrenheit.  The following photos show a bit of the "pipe explosions" created by the most significant cold snap in this area since 1938--created by global warming, no doubt about it.

Seed for yet another hub. No doubt about that, either.